Tuesday, June 30, 2009

What a nice God

One year ago today we packed up everything and threw it all into a rented, Uhaul truck. We had been talking back and forth about leaving our home, for weeks on end. Micah had already started work in Southern Utah, and I was staying with the house and kids up in Idaho. He would drive home every other week on his off-shift, to see us. It was hell. We missed him so much, and I remember being so ready to move on. And Micah was so ready to stop commuting 800 miles to work every week.

We finally decided to abandon ship, pack up, and just go! It was a crazy, spontaneous decision. But it wasn't poorly made. It was a decision based on trust between us and God. We had prayed long and hard about this one, asking God to help us do what was right for our little family. So although we went forward in darkness, there was a huge light guiding our way, under the direction of a loving Father in heaven.

Prayers answered.

A week before we left Idaho I posted something on thebabywearer.com about meeting like-minded folks in South Utah, as we would be moving there. This wonderful woman piped up and told me about a forum for Cedar City folks. That is where I met this other wonderful woman, Rebekah, who offered for us to stay at her grandparent's ranch while we looked for a place to live. She said we could sleep in the barn, or in a tent outside. At first I wasn't sure. After all, we didn't even know these people, besides some chatting on the forum, and a few pictures on a blog. But deep down I knew this was one of the answers to my prayers.
When she sent a picture of the place we'd be staying, I instantly knew it would be wonderful.

So one year ago today we packed up everything, threw it all into a rented, Uhaul truck, and drove to Rebekah's grandparent's ranch.
We slept in the "green barn", which turned out to not house animals, but people. We slept comfortably on double beds in a small room. It was hot, but cozy. I felt right at home. And Rebekah's grandparents turned out to be some of the nicest people I've ever met.
**Rebekah was actually moving there with her family at the end of August, so I was also excited to get to meet her later on.

So, while Micah was at work we spent our days chasing lizards, swimming in the lake, and looking for apartments.

And kept on praying.

We found an apartment through this same forum. Another nice girl spoke up and recommended an apartment, which she rented from the same landlords. The words "cheap" and "large backyard" was music to our ears.
We moved in July 14th.

Waiting for the light.

Those first months here were very lonely, and extremely hard. Probably some of the most difficult times I've ever experienced. I had never felt loneliness like this before. I missed my husband so much when he was gone. When he was out in the field I couldn't talk to him. I had to learn patience that I didn't know was possible, as I had the kids all week long by myself.
And I didn't know a soul. It seemed like no one understood what I was going through. I would often cry myself to sleep after I got the kids to bed, just aching for someone to talk to, or to come over and be my friend.

All I could do was pray, and ask for God's continued guidance. I knew that He knew that this would work out. So even though it was so hard, I waited in this aching darkness, for it to all get better.

God is light.

One year ago, is long gone. In fact, it's hard to even remember those feelings I had. In fact, the other day I was telling Micah, "Remember when we first moved here? Those are such happy memories! We were so excited to move, and everything just worked out so well!!"

Well, they really did! Months went by and we could surely see God's hand in our lives, as he helped guide us and lead us in the ways we needed.

We live in the perfect apartment, which suits our needs just fine for the time being.
I even made a sand pit for the kids to play in, in our big backyard.

We've made the most wonderful friends. I have so many wonderful people in my life to keep me busy and happy.

(Rebekah and Sally)

Micah isn't working long shifts anymore. He got a more suitable position, so we have our family back together more often.

I absolutely love it here. The people are nice, the mountains are beautiful. There's plenty to do, and see, and experience. Everything worked out exactly as it should have. Sometimes it is really hard to see ahead. It's those dark times that we just have to trust God, and go.

There is a wooden plaque hanging on our wall that I made for Micah.
He said in a letter to me, while we were going through this hard time,
"What a nice God, to bring us to this place that we really like."



arianne said...

What wonderful, deep reflection. I'm so glad you're here. I really needed friends too, right about the time I met you! I'm so glad you're here.

Zen Mama said...

What a great post!
(I would love to be in that circle of babywearing mamas out in your yard -- that looks so heavenly!)

Sally Jackson said...

Thanks Arianne. What a nice thing to say. And Heather, someday you'll have to just take a road trip to Utah and hang out in my backyard. :)

redrockmama said...

Ooooh I loved this blog! First of all, I love your sign. It is beautiful and it is true.

I am so glad you are here. SO GLAD!

Rebekah said...

I love you Sally- love that you are here and that I know you. It's funny you still have those pictures I sent you. I remember when we first talked and it was like "this is a girl I'm gonna like", and I do!