Tuesday, August 13, 2013

Goodbye Hawaii

 While I was swimming with the tropical fishies the other day, exploring these amazing underwater coral reefs near Maumae Beach, I couldn't feel sad that I was leaving Hawaii. Instead I felt blessed beyond reason that I have lived my life passionately for so many beautiful things. I've allowed myself to open my heart to unimaginable possibilities (unimaginable to me) for myself and my family and that's no reason to feel sad. I have had guidance from above all along my entire life even when I didn't realize it was happening, and that guiding light still leads on. 
So goodbye fishies, and corals, and beaches that I love. Goodbye dear friends that have touched my life for good. Goodbye my beautiful, breathtaking Big Island life-I am moving into a new direction that calls to me from the deepest corners of the Universe and straight to the warmest chambers of my heart. 
Now move over a bit fishies, and make room for red rock mountains, rolling rivers, and orange desert sunsets! There's more than enough room in my life for all of you!

 

 


I wrote the above paragraph on facebook a week before we left Hawaii. I decided to post it here because it is still true. 
During this move I have felt the powerful, guiding light from God lead our way, as we've led our family across the ocean to our final destination in Utah. 
Moving is scary. Moving is stressful. And moving takes a leap of faith that I often feel takes all the faith that I have!
When we arrived to the Big island 2 years ago I told myself (and anyone else who would listen to me) that,"I am NEVER moving again. EVER." I insisted that Hawaii my last stop before I died, and you'd have to peal my dead body off the black lava rocks to ever move me again. Yet here I am, moving again. You can chalk this move right up there with, "I will never get married, I will never homeschool my kids, and I will never be a Mormon, again."  Check, check, and.....check--I called my own bluffs three times in the past 15 years, and can't imagine my life any differently.

The morning of our departure from Hilo I was a crying wreck of a woman! I cried when I said goodbye to our chickens, I cried when I said goodbye to our little house, and I cried when my 3 year old asked me if there were Honus living in Utah. I was finally tired of feeling sorry for myself when I opened my scriptures to a scripture that would end up carrying me through the day. It was in Doctrine and Covenants 50: 41-42:

"Fear not, little children, for you are mine, and I have overcome the world, and you are of them that my Father hath given me; And none of them that my Father hath given me shall be lost."

I felt for certain in that moment that Christ was speaking to my soul, reminding me that He would never allow me to be lost. Wherever I go in life, He will guide me, be with me, and move me where I will be happiest in that season of my life.
 I thought about that scripture all throughout the day and night as we went through all the chaos of moving our family. When my mind would start to worry about how much I would miss Hawaii, I immediately knew I would not feel lost. When my mind started to spiral into  negative thoughts about how I would adjust again to living in rural Utah, I was reminded again that I would not be lost--that I would make new friends, and find ways to use my talents and abilities to bless my family and community. 
I know that I cannot be lost with the Lord by my side.

This is the creek next to our new house here in Utah. It is beautiful. 
Watching my children splash and play in it this past week has made me so happy. 
They've been making stone knives and cutting down branches:
They've been collecting dinosaur eggs and building dinosuar nests:
They've been swimming in the creek on hot afternoons:
I truly really love it here. Thank you Lord for never letting me get lost. I am right where I want to be.

4 comments:

arianne said...

Love your photos and your words. (You can skateboard?!) Welcome back to Utah.

Da Denninghoff's said...

Love it! Just beautiful! All of it!

Katherine said...

I love reading your words. You are so full of joy and love and faith and goodness. Thank you for sharing from your soul. These pictures are amazing!

Sally Jackson said...

Thank you Arianne! Glad to be back! And yes, this old lady can still ride a sk8board--lol! Nita, muchos mahalos for your enthusiasm. Katherine-- Your comment reminded me to always write from my soul. Love you!