Wednesday, July 6, 2016

Maybe I'm just homesick

I felt bad after venting last week about people's bad manners that were affecting me. In fact, I thought about deleting the entire post completely but then reasoned that sometimes venting is a healthy way to express one's feelings. Hopefully nobody gets offended. Afterall, the truth of the world is that people flake out from time to time. That's just the nature of being human. The reason I was so upset was that there just happened to be a rapid series of flake-outs in a short amount of time that were affecting me.  One after another--boom boom boom, until I felt depleted and wiped out.
I admit I flake out from time to time! In fact, I recall last year my friend inviting our entire family to her son's 2nd birthday party so I said Yes! We will be there! Then she asked me if I could help manage one of the booths for a carnival game and I said Yes! I would love to! Next thing I know it's a Friday night and the phone rings. It's my friend telling me they missed us at the party and hoped everything was okay. Crap. I forgot the party.
It was a real low of my life, but also a humble reminder that I am not infallible, even though I wish I was. I apologized profusely and hoped she would still be my friend. Fortunately yes, she is still speaking to me.

So all this tension was building up inside me last week. Usually going for a long run is my cure for stress, so I ran 4 miles on Friday and felt pretty good and relaxed when I got home. Then I found the neighbors nasty little dog in my front yard and it jumped up and bit me. Yep, I got bit by a dog on the back of my leg and it hurt. Next thing I know I'm kicking and swearing at the this little jerk and  right back where I started with feeling overwhelmed, tense, and angry with the world. Stupid dog. (Yes I called animal control and filed a report. They're hopefully going to get rid of that sorry animal.)

The next day we went to a luau here in Cedar City for our friend's baby. These friends moved here from Oahu 2 years ago and I was fortunate to meet them through a facebook group. And you know how Hawaiians throw the biggest parties for their baby's first birthday? Well, this was no exception being in Utah, they still threw a pretty rocking baby luau.
First of all the meat was amazing, all cooked by the husband and his cousins: Kahlua pig, Kalbi beef, Teriyaki chicken, and rice. They also served pizza, fruit, salad, noodles, nachos, chips, cupcakes, and pudding! But here's the huge icing on the cake and the thing my boys are still talking about: They rented a shave-ice truck to park at the party and gave everybody any kine shave ice they wanted for the duration of the party! I think Odin went back for three different shave ice in 3 hours!
For entertainment they had the balloon guy come and make balloons for the kids, and face painting, too. They rented a bounce house and had a kiddie pool with squirt guns. They had Jawaiian reggae music blasting the entire time, which of course, took me right back to the islands.

Anyways, the point is that this was an amazing party and it was really fun, but here's the thing: I couldn't stop bawling for the first 20 minutes after we got there because it made me so homesick. The music, the Hawaiians cooking at the BBQ, the luau food- it was all too much for my little Hawaii-sick heart to bear. I started sobbing like a baby and had to go sit in the car and cry until I could come back out and assimilate with the other happy party goers. I hadn't realized how much I really truly miss Hawaii and how being away for so long can take a toll on me.
I miss the ocean. I miss the people. I miss the culture. I miss the music. I miss the foods. I miss the warm breezes and lush flora and fauna. I miss the humidity! I miss the whole darn island lifestyle. Life gets really busy over here raising my keikis, so I don't often stop to realize how far removed I am from Hawaii culture. It's a whole different world over here in Southern Utah and I think a part of me gets a little lost and confused when I am too disconnected from my Hawaii. Walking into that luau was a slap in the face of Aloha that I sorely need in my life. Oh Hawaii, you are too far away...Too too far away.

The ending of this story is, I came away from this luau feeling  cleansed from my tension and determined to spread more aloha and less ranting. I hope I can keep it up!

1 comment:

Unknown said...

Love to see my family enjoying themselves & having fun. xoxo